So, I'm talking to people online and I started talking to this guy that hangs out at AEPi. So, story has it..it was them that made Nick dumped me. Supposibly they told him if he ditched me, his parents would lighten up and he could come back......and that it'd be like it use to be before me and that they'd be nicer though since they didnt have to tease him about being a virgin.

I really wish that isn't true. Yet, Nick has such low self esteem and so lonely and depressed there could be some validation to it.

I loved those AEPi guys, why would they do that to me?

I love Nick, why would he?

GOD, I HATE MYSELF.

He came to me so many nights wanting to leave the frat. They were always making up fines just to see if they could get him mad, always treating him like a pledge still, constantly making fun of him, vandalizing his room, practically destroyed his computer...always riding his ass for stuff but not the other guys...and they did this to him ever since he's been in the house and he couldnt take it anymore.His big brother thought he could tell him when and where he could and couldnt go and nick was just pissed. I don't understand why he'd pick that over me.

I love him so much.

I hated seeing him treated that way but I knew the guys mattered to him.

Bronson was such a jerk and now is like his best bud.

I hate this.

I hate this.

I hate this.

Even more, I hate me for being so damned stupid.

I FUCKING HATE ME.