Sooo James didnt talk to me at all today and I don't know if it's just the whole he's scared or if it's he's avoiding me or if I did something wrong.

Nick can be a jackass though and he claims he talked to James. In which case, I get this horrible sinking feeling that he finished ruining whatever it was I didn't quite finish.

I didn't have any alcohol nor did any frats really talk to me. Swirls did a little though.

I havent decided about rush.

Also, I met Kent today and a few others.

I just don't know though anymore.

Things are so complicated and I just feel like looking around and with tearful eyes saying "what the fuck"

I can never reach warren either and most my moberly friends are becoming non-visable.

I spent some time with Sandy tonight. He is a nice guy and he can become a friend. Problem is, I guess most the night I talked about James.

I'm just so damned confused.

I ...guess....I already miss him.

*shrugs*

oh well, I stayed up until 6 am again. go me.

I just cant sleep.

Nothing is right.

Everything's a mess.

James, I'm so sorry for everything.