I leave tomorrow. w00t.
We're going camping.
I'm still not sure where or what I shall ever do.
But yay, pictures and fishing and fire....yay!
I'm excited :)
I've had major camping fever.
I'll try to post in the morning but no guarantees...either way you know I'll post when I get back.

Here are some thoughts before I go:
~Kevin has mysteriously disappeared.
~Steve has mysteriously disappeared.
~Jeff has mystersiously disappeared.
~ So let me get this straight, 3 guys I care about a lot...talk to me one day, are fine, say the'll catch me later because they have something important they each had to do...and then they mysteriously vanish?
~What did I do?
~I told you, I'm just not gf material.
~Why aren't I hurting?
~Do I really care?
~Did I do something?
~Jeff has been vanished a few weeks now... and it was odd because we were like closer than ever in our friendship. We're talking like best friend material.
~Steve is gone, too. Maybe I pissed him off with being honest about what I was thinking. I don't know, but it's not like him to just vanish.
~Kevin though, where is he? He said on Sunday he was going to make a fax and would be back in like 30 minutes and he's never been back. Is he just busy? Or does he forget so quickly about me since he is so busy with his "lifestyle"? Or did he finally catch on to the fact that I'm really not that happy with him?
~Why is Sean going so nuts to see me? Should I cut this mistress crap and tell him I dont need a "slave"? I mean, c'mon, what the fuck is that all about anyway?
~I know I keep saying I don't think I can see Scott...and then I go and let him come over... but I really don't think I can now. Someone very dear to me gave me some advice and I just dont think I can do it anymore.
~I'm not a cheater and I really can't stand swingers. I can't. In all honesty, I'm disturbed by it all and grossed out. I gave it a chance, what more could you ask of me?
~But why did I even try it? Was I *that* down on myself? Did I have such little faith in me? Did I really just disrespect myself that much? Either way, I gave it a shot when I shouldnt have...now let me go, people.
~This "sex kitten" thing is out of hand, too.
~I want a guy that is going to be pissed that I tried checking out swingers.
~I want a guy that is going to want me all to himself.
~I want a guy that would be pissed about how random guys talk to me.
~I dont want jealousy, I do want trust... but I want to know he cares about me more than anyone.
~Kevin's just not that.
~No swinger will ever be that.
~But I can't get the good boys now... they want the holy, goody goody virgins...and that's not me either.
~Sometimes I think I truly am not gf material and that I should accept that I'll never be happy.
~Why does R.K. keep insisting so much on wanting to get me pregnant? I have news for him...NO! He's not going to get to be alone with me.
~Then there's this wal-mart worker that found my profile online...I can never go to Wal-Mart the same again after how this guy is..*wowza* keep your pants on!
~Sarah is up to something. She'll be an uber bitch and then say it was Lisa on her computer. What's the deal with that?
~Sometimes I feel really confident about SMSU. Other times, I want to blow cheese out of my ears when I think about it. *sighs*
~I do think this is the right major for me though: Wildlife Conservation ....w00t w00t
~I erased almost all my yahoo contacts. I didnt tell them though. I dont think I ever will. *shrugs*
~My cough is also back, damn.
~I found out my Dad has a concealed weapon. Ok, so it's not concealed...but it is to me! Apparently he keeps a loaded hand gun by his chair. Why am I suddenly scared about making him mad?
~Definitely coming off this "sites"... I just have to, but it'll be hard.
~My new computer game... let me play it once...and now my computer like rejects it.
~The two new kittens are cute...they need names though. Any ideas?
~My sister, Becky, totally didn't realize Cheese is white now. She was like "I see Quackers and the khakis.. but where's Cheese?" My mom is like "right there" And she's like "I dont see a yellow one" and mom's like "he's white"....Becky goes "oooohhhh! when did that happen? I was looking for a big yellow duck!"
~Speaking of Becky...her husband, Larry, got custody of his son, Ryan. Most my family doesnt like the kid. He's reaching his teens and is mouthy. Most of all, he's Larry's is why they dont like him. But I kinda like him....something about him... I dont know, maybe I feel like he needs me. So, I'm going to take over and let him call me "Aunt Roni"...that's right, I'm going to claim Ryan. Yay, I now have a nephew by marriage...he's in 5th grade and going into 6th. He just moved here from Middle Grove. Watch out Moberly Middle School....Ryan is coming!
~QU apparently never acknowledged my deferrments and never said anything, just sent it on to a collection agency and gained interest. Now I have copies of the forms I sent in to defer with. Gah, damned college.
~I should go... really, I must pack for tomorrow....I'll be back in a few days.
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ONE MORE THING!
So many people did this that I just *had* to...it's so accurate, I'm scared!

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who have a split personality - cold as ice on the outside but hot as fire in the heart.

In love, you feel the most alive when things are straight-forward, and you're told that you're loved.

You'd like to your lover to think you are stylish and alluring.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was insecure and in constant need of reassurance.

Your ideal relationship is lasting. You want a relationship that looks to the future... one you can grow with.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage as something precious. You'll treasure marriage and treat it as sacred.

In this moment, you think of love as something you thirst for. You'll do anything for love, but you won't fall for it easily.

*UPDATE* As mysteriously as Jeff disappeared....he just reappeared :|

I'm confused.