Sometimes....I wish life had a fastforward button so I could just skip ahead to being old and gray and not worrying about all this.
All what, you ask? Well simple...EVERYTHING.
My college plans are falling into place finally. It's about friggin time. I've figured out my goals and I'm heading for them. Oh yeah, UMR, watch out...I'll be back in a few weeks ;)
I really miss my KD sisters. I dont talk to them enough.
Lori, I wish I could come visit ya. But you'll get plenty of your twin soon enough.
Kristen, I insist you do come back :)
James, *sniffles* dont stay in Indiana. Ok, so James isnt a sister, but he might as well be *smirks*
So anyway, I just got home from camping.
Ryan apparently has a mundo big crush on me. Apparently he doenst understand 3 concepts: 1. I'm his AUNT by marriage. 2. I'm 20 and would never want a kid his age. and 3. EWWWWWWW
Samantha is about to hit puberty and OMFG could she get any moodier? (Is moodier a word?)
Robbie cries more than any little boy I've ever seen. I swear, he has more sensitive genes than I do.
Austin is such a little gentlemen. I cant wait to take him to the cards game again on thursday :)
I had nightmares the entire time we were camping. Why? I dont know but I wish it would stop. About what? My ex boyfriends. Josh kept talking about how much he cant wait to marry Katie. I felt like yelling "then do it" because to be honest, I'm not really concerned. I dont care anymore. I guess you could say I'm way over him since I dont even have the desire to see how he's doing. Then Tim showed up in the dream, pissed that I havent called him. I was like "huh? what? it's over" Then Kevin kept showing up in the background laughing at me. Then there was Nick. Nick didnt say anything. He just kept doing that adorable little puppy dog look he'd do when he wanted tacos. Anyway though that's WAY too many exs to have in one dream and I definitely woke up each night, unable to go back to sleep.
Here's my theory on what it all means:
I think I'm finally over Josh and I'm not upset about him marrying Katie. She can have him and I do wish them the best of luck. I think it was also saying that I should yell at Tim. Ok, so it's not saying that but I think my mind is trying to make sense of him still. Kevin made me feel like a joke. I think that's why he was laughing in it. But as for Nick...I dont get that. Why would I dream about him? I havent even talked to him in months...PLUS he probably still hates me. Ya know, I bitched a lot when we broke up. Dont back up and read the entries, they are really mean. I was just so mad at him for making me a mockery with that damned lavaliere thing. I guess I just wonder how he's doing...but then again, maybe I dont need to know.
Anyway, my parents have really been on my case lately. I feel like hoping in the car and just driving...far far far away. Or just going to Taco Bell, sitting down, and having a good long talk with someone...but ya know, that'd require someone to have time to actually talk to me. Hmm, I dont think that's happening.
I just feel...overwhelmed and so emotional and confused. There's so much that's happened in the last 2 years that I sooo dont get.
If anyone wants to explain any of it to me, please do. Ya know you can pick a category: Josh, Kevin, Tim, Nick, UMR, QU, EVERYTHING
Any takers?